Ask the SHM's
by Flamerkiller
Summary: I have the three most dangerous and vinallious bunch in all of Final Fantasy and they're here to answer you questions! Note: The characters aren't mine and they may be a litte OCC.
1. Chapter 1

**Ask the S.H.M's**

Flamerkiller: Hey people! Flamerkiller here! Just wanted to let ya know that I have Kadaj, Yazoo, and Loz hostage! (Jk) I asked them to come and answer questions from fans and they said yes!

Kadaj: I thought it would be interesting so I agreed. (Whispered) Being threatened by big brother helped too.

Yazoo: We need a break from looking for mother anyways…

K: How dare you say that!!!! Don't make me regret my decision!

Loz: Why is Kadaj being mean? (Starts to cry)

Fk: Kadaj look what you did! You made Loz cry! There, there Loz. (Cuddles Loz) Don't make me get Cloud!

K: (scared voice) you don't need to do that.

Y: Would you like me to take over introducing us?

Fk: Sure

Y: Okay so like Fk was saying, we're here to answer questions from you, the fans, no matter what they may be. (Wink)

K: Huh? W-what do you mean by that Yaz?

Fk: I'll tell ya later.

L: If you want to ask us questions, you know what to do!

Fk: To clarify what Loz is trying to say, send your questions via review and you should get your answer the next day or by the end of the week depending on my mood. That's all for now!

Everybody: See ya!


	2. Chapter 2

**Flamerkiller: OMG! **

**Kadaj: omg?**

**Fk: It means Oh My God.**

**K: Oh… Why are you OMG-ing?**

**Fk: Cause you guys got 7 "letters" to answer! Aren't you excited?**

**Yazoo: (apathetically) Ecstatic.**

**Fk: Very funny. Anyways the first "letter" we're gonna read is from… Amor y Sombra.**

Ha, this should be fun ) I like the idea.Do they dye their hair?  
Why does Yazoo never reload his gun?

**K: No we don't need too. Our hair is natural.**

**Y: I do need to reload it, I just do it when no ones looking.**

**Fk: Okay this next one is from shibara1310.**

Haha, that's funny. Okay, any question? All right...I always wondered why Loz is a crybaby. Um, no offense...heh...and why is Kadaj the leader? I mean, he's the youngest...I know he's more the type, but I can't see why Yazoo and Loz would want to follow him around! Don't they ever get fed up with him?

**Loz: I'm not a crybaby! **

**Y: (sarcastically) Of course you're not! **

**K: It's not my fault I'm more driven to find mother than these two are.**

**Y&L: Yes but we learned to get used to it.**

**Fk: Right… Next one is from dantesdarkqueen.**

All right. I'm game.

Kadaj: Why do you think Jenova is your mom? She's not your mom, and she was not Sephiroth's mother. Lucrecia was! Mothers don't treat their children like Jenova treats all four of you!

Yazoo: Why are you constantly being portrayed as the 'girl' in gay relationships? I mean, you're always the bitch and you're paired up with EVERYONE. Cloud, Reno, Loz, Kadaj, Rufus, Sephiroth, Vincent... I could name men you've been involved with in fanfics all day. WHY? You aren't gay!

Loz: You do not really fit in with your brothers. I mean, Seph, Kadaj, and Yazoo all have long, silky hair that ladies just want to run their fingers through (gr-ROWL!), but you've just got a crew-cut. They're all slim and gorgeous, and you're broad-shouldered and bulky. Why are you so different?

All Three of You: What are your favorite bands and songs? Wanna come visit me? Or at least get rid of a little sister I need to disappear?

-Queen

**Fk: Wow… (Is speechless) Those are some long ass questions. No offense. Okay Kadaj, you start.**

**K: SHE IS MY MOTHER!!!! Stop saying she's not! What's next?! Are you gonna tell me that Cloud isn't my older brother?!**

**Fk: Umm… hehe… moving on! Yaz it's your turn! **

**Y: Ooh yayz it's my turn! Umm… hmm… I'm not really sure to be quite honest. It's not my fault I look girly. **

**L: Yes it is. You spend more time in the bathroom than Flamerkiller does. **

**Y: I do not!**

**Fk: You know he does have a point. And I also caught him using my exfoliating moisturizer mask once.**

**Y: I did not!**

**Fk: Sure you didn't. Umm… Loz it's your turn.**

**L: I'm supposed to symbolize Sephiroth's strength. And I'll have you know that if I don't use gel in my hair it's almost as long as Kadaj's so there. (Sticks his tongue out at Queen) **

**Fk: Ok guys the next one is for all three of you. Who wants to go first?**

**Y: I DO! Umm… let's see. I would have to say Fall Out Boy is my favorite band and my favorite song from them is Thanks for the Memories. **

**K: I have to disagree I think Linkin Park is the best and they're best song is What I've Done. **

**L: I'd go with Saliva or Metallica. I like all their songs. **

**K: Where would you like us to make your sister disappear to? (insanely evil grin)**

**Fk: Okay, before Kadaj goes Sephiroth on us, let's go to the next "letter"! This next one is from C2-Chikaru.**

TwT someone's gotta break the truth ta ya...ya do notice ya called Aeris Mother right and she's not really your mother...unless your talking about your 'mother' wink (hinthintnudgenudge) XD

**K: I did? **

**Fk: You don't remember?**

**K: Not really, all I remember was a bright white light and then poof I was alive again. **

**Fk: That's what happened to Cloud.**

**Cloud: Someone call me?**

**Fk: Get outta here! **

**C: FINE!!!**

**Fk: Okay the next "letter" is from RAS144.**

Do you guys know a guy named Riku by any chance?

**K: Not really…**

**Y: Never heard of him.**

**L: Umm… (Starts to think)**

**Fk: This is gonna take a while. Well, these are the questions I had time for. I promise you guys that I if I missed your question, I will get to it as soon as I can. **

**Everyone: Till next time!**


	3. Chapter 3

** Flamerkiller: Hey guys sorry to have to say this but I've been getting more flames about this Q&A than I have reviews so I'm going to send the boys back home. **

**Kadaj: It was an... interesting experience but we really should go back to searching for mother. **

**Yazoo: Yes, we should.**

**Loz: (sniff, sniff) Yeah... I'm gonna miss you guys!! **

**Flamerkiller: Awwe! Don't worry Loz! You can always comeback and visit!**

**Loz: Okay! **

**Flamerkiller: It was fun. I just feel bad for all those people whose questions didn't get answered. Thanks to all the people who reviewed and as for the people who flammed me... Go to hell!!!!!**


	4. Chapter 4

**Flamerkiller: Hey guys!!!! You've convinced me! I'm gonna start this thing up again but it's going to take me a while. The boys haven't decided if they really want to do it again. **

**Kadaj: Do I have to? **

**Yazoo: Yes you do. We want to do it. Right Loz?**

**Loz: Yeah! Cause I really missed the fans and Flamerkiller.**

**Flamerkiller: Awwe!!! I missed you to!! (Hugs Loz)**

**Loz: Okay now you're getting too clingy. **

**Flamerkiller: Okay so you guys got to do the convincing!! See if you can win them over. **


	5. Chapter 5

**Flamerkiller: Hey guys!!!! Guess what?!!!**

**Kadaj: What?!!! **

**Yazoo: She's not talking to us. She's talking to the fans! **

**Kadaj: Oh...**

**Flamerkiller: Like I was saying, you've officially convinced them!!! They're coming back!!! **

**Kadaj: Yes we are. (Under his breath: Unfortunately)**

**Flamerkiller: I heard that!!!! **

**Kadaj: (Takes out Souba) Do you dare challenge me? **

**Flamerkiller: Yes I do. (Takes out Buster Sword)**

**Kadaj: Where did you get that?!**

**Flamerkiller: Cloud let me borrow it.**

**Kadaj: Oh... Let's do this.**

**(Start to fight)**

**Loz: Go Flamerkiller!**

**Kadaj: (Dodges a blow from Flamerkiller) Whose side are you on?!**

**Loz: Mine?**

**Yazoo: Okay... so we just wanna say thanks to shibara1310, forgiven4ever, pangpond, ChaosDynasty, and all the others for supporting us and Flamerkiller. **

**Flamerkiller: (Gets thrown down) Ouch that hurt. Alright you win.**

**Kadaj: Ha!**

**Flamerkiller: Don't get too full of yourself. Anyways, the next installment will be up sometime after Christmas. **

**Everyone: See ya!**


End file.
